Home > Author Archives: Dr. I. M. Swindler

Author Archives: Dr. I. M. Swindler

A lover of everything controversial and/or satirical. Takes nothing serious and finds a way to laugh at anything, anytime. Perhaps the smartest person on Earth but sucks at proper grammar. All geniuses have a weakness, no?

Former President Obama Proving Spying Is Not Always A Bad Thing.

Former President Obama Proving Spying Is Not Always A Bad Thing. 1 vote / 5 Stars EVERYNOOKANDCRANYIN, America – Sometimes, throughout our lives, we hear words that automatically trigger negative emotions; Hitler, Satan, Osama Bin Laden, Nickelback just to name a few. Do we ever get it wrong? Do we ever automatically supplant a negative connotation to something before we give it a chance to be OK? That’s something we all need to ask ourselves as we work through the suggestion that Former President Barack Obama used the powers of the Oval Office to spy on both well-known antagonists around the world, and everyday normal folks simply living their lives. As we look into some of the examples of the former Presidents ...

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CIA GO: Collect Them All

CIA GO: Collect Them All 2 votes / 5 Stars SILICON VALLEY, California – The recent scandals tormenting the CIA (Central Intelligence Agency) have given a much-deserved black eye to the once proud American Institution. Most organizations would deny the allegations and simply wait for the bad publicity and mistrust to blow over. Instead, the agency has decided to own their apparent misdeeds and win back public support by having some fun with the public at large. On Wednesday of next week Facebook inc. With the full cooperation of Apple computers and the CIA will release a new App named CIA Go™. The CIA Go™ app will function much like the Pokémon Go™ app but is far more robust with several additional ...

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Donald Trump The Leader Of The Great Hats?

Donald Trump The Leader Of The Great Hats? 5 votes / 5 Stars NEW YORK, New York – 2016 was the year of iconic election moment after iconic election moment. From Wikileaks to #Pizzagate and everywhere in-between we all became concessioners of every bit of vile fodder from the leading parties. Through it all, the most iconic feature remains Donald Trump’s red “Make America Great Again” ball cap. Before you decide to pat The Donald on the back for his election artifact acumen, our research indicates he was not the first, nor the last person to adopt the Great Red Hat. Here is a list of others who used the Red Hat on their rise to near victory. +160

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CIA Drawing Ire from DC’s Previous toughest kid on the block

CIA Drawing Ire from DC’s Previous toughest kid on the block 1 vote / 5 Stars DEVELOPING…… ASHBURN, Virginia – Unless you have been stranded on a desert island without internet access for the last 24 hours you are likely aware that the CIA is in the proverbial dog house. They (CIA) have been implicated in the largest spying conspiracy in almost a week (see Obama Trump). Unfortunately, these new revelations go far beyond spying and find themselves knee-deep in scandals involving murder and assassinations.  One group in DC has taken notice and is especially appalled at the CIA’s apparent lack of understanding of copyright infringement. The Clinton Foundation, which is well-known for <cough> “charity” work around the world, also ...

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CZ Boss Phone Changing Prisons Through Keistering

Rate this post CINCINNATI, Ohio – An idea whose time has finally come. The world was recently introduced to the ‘3 in 1 Long-CZ J8 Beat The Boss’ phone and has left us wondering how we ever lived without it. It is the smallest phone in the world and boasts it’s “beat the boss” feature. For those of you who have never been to prison, The “B.O.S.S” is an acronym for Body Orifice Security Scanner. The “B.O.S.S” is used to scan prison inmates bodies for anything hidden through ‘keistering’. If you are unaware of what keistering is rent the movie “Get Hard,” and prepare for an eye-opening experience. By all accounts, this “phone” is marketing almost exclusively to a prison ...

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President Trump Scheduled To Make Racist Remarks

Rate this post NEW YORK, New York – Being President Of The Unites States is exhausting, time-consuming, and constant. Even the most energetic and detailed among us would have a difficult time keeping up with the type of demands Donald Trump has recently had thrust upon him. It’s easy to become complacent and occasionally forget a step or two, but when it comes to diversity those same missteps get magnified tremendously. Reports out of Washington D.C. recently have suggested that it has been several days since The President’s words have overtly offended anyone based on color, religion, gender, or sexual preference. Some inner circle social justice warriors have spoken out on this and have gained the attention of The Trump ...

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President Trump To Adorn commemorative Cheetos Bag

President Trump To Adorn commemorative Cheetos Bag 1 vote / 5 Stars COLUMBUS, Ohio – A big announcement is expected soon from the Frito-Lay corporation regarding our newly elected President Donald J. Trump. According to reports, a new partnership has been formed which will allow The President to appear on specially designed Cheetos® Puffs snack packages. A spokesman close to Pepsico (Which owns Frito-Lay, the manufacturer of Cheetos®) claims, “Orange is the color of our dreams,” will be the new tag line for the Cheetos® ‘Presidential Puffs’ snack brand.  Sales of Cheetos® have skyrocketed since President Trump was coined ‘Cheeto Jesus’ by Republican political strategist Rick Wilson in a rant he posted on Twitter in mid-June 2016. This partnership seems ...

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Twelve Internet Rumors You Didn’t Know Were True

Twelve Internet Rumors You Didn’t Know Were True 2 votes / 5 Stars SILICON VALLEY, California – The social media universe has become a proverbial treasure trove of conspiracy theory and satire. It is nearly impossible for any of us to maintain a grip on what is true and what is, well, utter BS. What if some of these stories were true? We have scanned the interwebs in an attempt to bring you the top 12 social media conspiracies that are actually true. 00

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President Trump Caught Red Handed

President Trump Caught Red Handed 1 vote / 5 Stars ASHBURN, Virginia – It was inevitable that before long, the truth about President Donald Trump would be absolutely clear. With major media outlets, street quasi-journalists, and the alt-left news organizations (CNN, NBC, CBS, ABC, BBC, New York Times (this is exhausting) working tirelessly to pin any kernel of impropriety on him. Some reports stuck for moments in time, while others were immediately whisked away in the cumbersome noise of the ‘Fake news’ industry. Now everything has changed. Evidence is everything in the news industry (I know, I know), so when accusations are accompanied by real evidence the ‘fair-minded’ segments of the population start to get nervous and finally listen. ты идиот ...

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Former President Obama sneaks into whitehouse, forgot his ‘stash’

Former President Obama sneaks into whitehouse, forgot his ‘stash’ 3 votes / 5 Stars WASHINGTON D.C. – in a scene right out of a James Bond meets Cheech and Chong spoof, former President Barack Obama was briefly taken into custody Saturday for trying to reclaim the ‘Presidential stash.’  According to reports, the former President used the tunnel system under the White House to gain entrance into the west wing. He then entered the Presidential bedroom, pulled up the mattress, and removed an estimated 2 pounds of Blue Dream.   We knew he was here. We just really dont have protocols for former presidents, especially the day after they leave office. – anonymous White House official Capital police had no choice ...

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