Paying the bills

CIA GO: Collect Them All

SILICON VALLEY, California - The recent scandals tormenting the CIA (Central Intelligence Agency) have given a much-deserved black eye to the once proud American Institution....

Allah to Followers: If I Wanted the Infidels Dead I Would...

TEHRAN, Iran - Allah, the great and merciful God of the Muslim religion has the power to create great floods, send earthquakes to level...

DNC to Hand Debbie Wasserman Schultz Over to ISIS for Beheading

Democrats, especially those loyal to Senator Sanders, are a difficult crowd to please.  Given the release of emails from DNC employees which shows conclusively...

Cheap Chinese Eucharist Carcinogenic, Catholics Upset

BRAINTREE, Massachusetts - The holy sacrament of the Eucharist is as much a part of the Catholic lifestyle as shaking hands during the Peace segment...

Former President Obama Proving Spying Is Not Always A Bad Thing.

EVERYNOOKANDCRANYIN, America - Sometimes, throughout our lives, we hear words that automatically trigger negative emotions; Hitler, Satan, Osama Bin Laden, Nickelback just to name a...

Daughter of Eric Garner, Erica Garner : Dont “Use” My Father.

The Clinton campaign has bitten off more than it can chew in the newest released emails from Wikileaks. Erica Garner, the daughter of Eric...

Tom Brady Caught Cheating During Family Game Night.

QUINCY, Mass -  Times just continue to get more difficult for Tom Brady. Arguably the greatest quarterback in the history of the NFL finds...

ODNI Releases Assessment of Russian Hacking that’s Completely Useless

Washington DC - The Office of the Director of National Intelligence (ODNI) released a public, unclassified version of their Russian hacking assessment titled Background to...

Congress to Change the Face of All US Cash

WASHINGTON D.C. - The entire nation is talking about the story coming out of the U.S. Mint regarding the changes in the faces on...

Huge Grocery Conspiracy: Why Produce is at Front of Supermarket

PEORIA, Illinois - Investigative journalists here at Immediate Safety have uncovered a grand conspiracy concerning the placement of produce in grocery stores and supermarkets....