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ISIS to Begin Using Softer, Gentler Ways to Punish Infidels

ISIS to Begin Using Softer, Gentler Ways to Punish Infidels4 votes / 5 Stars DAMASCUS, Syria – Economic struggles worldwide have hit everyone and terrorists are not immune to the struggles of making ends meet. Tourism has decreased dramatically in area’s controlled by ISIS militants and they have looked at many different ways to change their ability to balance the budget. “We ran a 4 Billion dollar deficit last year”, claims Awlaki Mohammad,  ISIS treasurer. “Infidels are afraid of us and have stopped coming. We need Infidels money badly.” Mohammad reached out to the Elsheikh Public Relations corporation for assistance with their marketing and image. Early on it looks like times are changing quickly for the Jihadist’s bottom line. As ...

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HomophobiPhobes Ruining Homosexuality for Everyone

HomophobiPhobes Ruining Homosexuality for Everyone6 votes / 5 Stars CHARLESTON, South Carolina – Violence against anyone is frowned upon in America and rightly so. Recently we have become aware of a new brand of hatred and violence coming out of Charleston, South Carolina, and the results have drug the entire capital city kicking and screaming into equal rights debates at every kitchen table in America. Homophobiphobes are a group that grew out of necessity and through the evolution of man’s grip on the rights of the individual and laws of the masses. As more laws are written or erased in regards to homosexuality, homophobes have stood on the front lines with a loud, mostly unopposed, voice. That is until now. ...

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International Peace Conference Ends in Fisticuffs, Violence, and Bloodshed

International Peace Conference Ends in Fisticuffs, Violence, and Bloodshed3 votes / 5 Stars NEW YORK, New York – Three men were arrested and 2 others were treated at a local hospital following a brawl at the 2016 International Peace conference. According to reports, the police were called by a witness after factions from two rival peace groups began battling about the best course for lasting peace.  Jerry Grey’s Peace and Love Coalition (PLC) has a following that believes strongly in the theory that peace is earned by being proactive. Tom McKracken’s Union for Lasting Peace (ULP) believes just the opposite. ULP members believe that peace can only be achieved by being reactive. Tom and Jerry have been arguing forever. Most ...

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