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President Trump Signs Executive Order Making Everything You Read Today Literally True

President Trump Signs Executive Order Making Everything You Read Today Literally True 1 vote / 5 Stars In a late night Oval Office session yesterday, President Trump signed an executive order making everything you read today literally true.  Spokepeople for the president hope this executive order will help gullible people have a better start to the second quarter of the year than they usually do. Part of making America great again is making people who believe anything happy again.  It’s all true.  Even the stuff I don’t like. –President Trump

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Riots in Punxsutawney as Anti-Winter Activists Reject Phil’s Prediction

Riots in Punxsutawney as Anti-Winter Activists Reject Phil’s Prediction 2 votes / 5 Stars Winter is not a popular season, especially in the north.  Most people just want it to end which is why Groundhog’s Day hold hope for many.  This year, however, the rodent celebrity of  Punxsutawney, PA had other things in mind.  At roughly 7:25 AM on the 2nd of February, Phil, or Punxsutawney Phil as he is better known to the world, predicted six more weeks of winter.  Reactions were mixed, but it would seem that anger sometimes takes a while to reach a full boil. This year has been an emotional one already, with half the country upset over the presidential election results.  Among the rest is ...

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Women March on Washington DC, Men March for a Sammich

Women March on Washington DC, Men March for a Sammich 4 votes / 5 Stars LOS ANGELES, CA – Women have taken to the streets in an effort to protest the election of Donald Trump on the day after his inauguration. The reasons were outlined in a Youtube video and a well-organized campaign to entice women and men who support their cause to get out and march. The verbiage on the website is moving including such statements as, “In the spirit of democracy and honoring the champions of human rights, dignity, and justice who have come before us, we join in diversity to show our presence in numbers too great to ignore.” Who could take issue?  These days, it’s not ...

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Um… WTF just happened?

Um… WTF just happened? 2 votes / 5 Stars Seriously.  We’ve been drinking.  I think we dreamed it, but did that just happen?  No foolin’? 00

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Daughter of Eric Garner, Erica Garner : Dont “Use” My Father.

Daughter of Eric Garner, Erica Garner : Dont “Use” My Father. 11 votes / 5 Stars The Clinton campaign has bitten off more than it can chew in the newest released emails from Wikileaks. Erica Garner, the daughter of Eric Garner, is not pleased to find that the Clinton campaign discussed ways to “use” her father (and who could blame her) for political gain. Wikileaks has done a tremendous job showing the rotten underbelly of politics in general and the Clinton campaign specifically. Below are the emails in question and the response from Ms. Garner. Re: HRC Op-Ed on Gun Violence From:[email protected] To:[email protected] Date: 2016-03-17 21:28 Subject: Re: HRC Op-Ed on Gun Violence That's a pretty good point. On Mar ...

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Breaking down the 2016 election in simple terms

Breaking down the 2016 election in simple terms 4 votes / 5 Stars FRESNO, California – Many people throughout The United States are still struggling with their decision as to who they intend to vote for in the 2016 election. Now I know that Gary Johnson fans (whom I respect immensely), and Jill Stein fans (whom I also have a lot of respect for) want to be heard from, but in my mind (right or wrong) neither has a legitimate chance at 270 electoral votes.  So we are left with 2 candidates who have a legitimate shot at winning. We’ve broken the election down between the two major candidates as a choice not made until the voter is inside the ...

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Isis leadership : We will leave America if Trump elected.

Isis leadership : We will leave America if Trump elected. 5 votes / 5 Stars DETROIT, Michigan – Isis operatives have added their names to the long list of people threatening to leave America if Donald Trump is elected. “We will not live in a country where we are in constant fear of being subjugated to hateful actions and speech”, said Ahmed Abdul Ali Jabra Johnson Smith (General of Isis Detroit). “We hope Americans are smart enough to elect Hillary Clinton so we can continue to recruit and import terrorists, I mean peace lovers, who will help us spread our brand of love to all Americans. God is great.” If Donald Trump is elected Isis would join a long list of ...

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88 Generals Endorse Trump, Hillary Incredulous

88 Generals Endorse Trump, Hillary Incredulous 4 votes / 4 Stars WASHINGTON, D.C.- The Trump campaign on Tuesday released a list of 88 current and former generals and admirals that have given Mr. Trump their endorsement for president. This was in response to the Clinton campaign releasing lists of prominent Republicans that had endorsed the former Secretary of State. The game is afoot with endorsements dropping on a daily basis as elites offer their names and clout in an attempt to rebuild relevance in the political Superbowl season. Both campaigns touted those who endorsed them while downplaying those who endorsed their opponent. “I am very proud to have the generals”, said Donald Trump (Republican nominee). “The generals have been so ...

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Truth in Politix Releases Little-Known Campaign Promises From Candidates

Truth in Politix Releases Little-Known Campaign Promises From Candidates 3 votes / 5 Stars WASHINGTON D.C. – Truth in politix, a nonpartisan political action group, has released their list of little-known campaign promises from both the Donald Trump (R) campaign, and the Hillary Clinton (D) campaign for president. Some of the promises are known to many political aficionados but others are so obscure that even the most seasoned political hacks are unaware of them. Both campaigns are pushing to get the all important independent vote and will pander relentlessly to do so. Here is a short list, with many surprises, that exist within the two campaigns. If you are aware of any other promises not listed here please feel free ...

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Warning : Millennials torn on who to support and eventually not vote for

Warning : Millennials torn on who to support and eventually not vote for 5 votes / 5 Stars SEATTLE, Washington – The 2016 presidential race has been one of the most contentious and tumultuous periods in American election history. This is an especially confusing time for millennials, who could make a difference if they actually voted. “I supported and didn’t vote for Bernie Sanders in the primary”, said Kaitlyn Andrews. “Now that it looks like he won’t win I suppose I will have to chose to support and not vote for either Trump or Clinton. I will have to make my decision soon as there are so many social media accounts to update.” Kaitlyn is not alone. According to the ...

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