Paying the bills

Walmart to Replace Stockers With Robots, Reactions Mixed on Stangflip strategy

BENTONVILLE, Arkansas - The Walmart corporation, the largest retailer in the world, is preparing to replace more than half of their overnight shelve stocking...

Air in Beijing an Effective Industrial Solvent

BEIJING, China - The air in Beijing is highly toxic.  It's so bad, it makes 1980s Los Angeles look like a fresh, spring meadow....

What Your Pizza Crust Choice Says About You

We all love pizza (unless there is something wrong with us).  Everyone has topping preferences, and some even have sauce preferences.  Pizza is so...

Acclaim set to release followup to “Guitar Hero” with “Cowbell Hero”

TIMPUEY, Hong Kong - The Acclaim corporation is set to make one of the biggest video game releases in recent memory next week with...

CZ Boss Phone Changing Prisons Through Keistering

CINCINNATI, Ohio - An idea whose time has finally come. The world was recently introduced to the '3 in 1 Long-CZ J8 Beat The...

How Do We Make Guns Safer?

Guns are inherently unsafe. They kill nearly everyone who comes near them.  That is, of course, with the inexplicable exception of redneck, white, conservative,...

Energy Drinks Lead to Dressing Like a Douche

SCOTTSDALE, Arizona - Consumption of energy drinks is growing exponentially, especially among young men with a penchant for acting stupid, dressing stupidly, and doing...