NOAA Answers the Question: ‘Where Da Hoes At’ with Science

SUITLAND, MD - The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, NOAA, the US's premier natural pattern studying organization, has taken a major leap forward in...

People Named Paul, Likely Serial Killers

Where the Hell is Paul? We all ask this question, at least any of us who know Paul.  He never seems to be around...

Chimps and Monkeys Skipping Straight From Stone Age to Information Age

It's recently been revealed that certain apes and monkeys have achieved the feat of making and using stone tools.  This occurs primarily only in...

Aliens Make Contact: Stop Giving Stars Stupid Names.

TACOMA, Wash. - Yesterday evening the National Star Registry (NSR) in Tacoma, Washington received a very special visit from a galaxy far far away. I...

Surviving Alien Abduction 2016

Every passing year brings with it more tales of abduction and horrors orchestrated by our visitors from above. From simple sightings to full horrifying...

Amazon : Forget Drones, Wormholes are the Future

GENEVA, Switzerland - The future is now, but it is not the future we were expecting. Geneva, Switzerland is all abuzz, as is the...

The Color Pink Linked to Outbreak in Breast Cancer

A new groundbreaking study will change the way we view breast cancer forever. This vile, disgusting disease that affects so many will soon be brought...

Witch Doctor Claims Computer Viruses Are Demons

ALEXANDRIA, Virginia - As if computers were not confusing enough to the bulk of the population, now it appears that they may be possessed...

Walmart to Replace Stockers With Robots, Reactions Mixed on Stangflip strategy

BENTONVILLE, Arkansas - The Walmart corporation, the largest retailer in the world, is preparing to replace more than half of their overnight shelve stocking...

Paying Attention During Sex: Avoiding Sexual Injuries

For whatever reason, hospitals are seeing a rise in sex-related injuries.  From that weirdness we talked about earlier, to hip dislocations and contortion related...