Paying the bills

Jared: From Pitching Subs to Tossing Salads

Jared Fogle has had quite an interesting couple of years. He has gone from one of America's top advertising faces with Subway restaurants to...

Immediate Safety Interviews Carly Fiorina

Did you honestly think we were going to do that?  Seriously?  She's completely irrelevant, and quite frankly we're disappointed that you even clicked the...

White Activists Seeking Reparations for Ancient Slavery

NEW YORK, New York - Several motions have been filed recently in the Southern District of New York Federal Court, seeking the right and...

Ted Cruz : How I Will Win the Gays? Calendars…

DALLAS, Texas - Senator and Presidential hopeful Ted Cruz is trying to fill every gap he can with voters, even if it means appealing...

Confirmed: Hillary Clinton Murdered a Baby With a Hammer

That's right, folks.  Hillary Clinton, the de facto Democratic nominee, and potential next president of the united states beat a tiny, innocent baby to...

Hillary Clinton to be Awarded Bronze Star for Gallantry

ARLINGTON, Virginia - During a surprise press conference this afternoon President Obama announced that he will award former Senator, and Secretary of State Hillary...

Bernie Sanders to Use Nickname “Mango” in an Effort to Win...

BURLINGTON, Vermont -"Lifting up his head he feels the sunlight in his eyes." Bernie Sanders, embroiled in a long tough fight with former Secretary of...

Kim Jong-Un releases Netflix and Chill safety video.

North Korea's supreme leader Kim Jong-Un has released a safety video to his people entitled "Netflix and Chill Why America is the Devil." Though...

Republican Leadership Tried Reverse Psychology to Derail Trump Train

SOUTH PARK, Colorado - Since November of 2015 the Republican establishment has been at war with Donald Trump. Every effort possible has been made...

Vegas Gives 3:1 – Tom Brady is Caught Cheating in this...

Rejoice! It is January again. A month full of snow, playoffs, and Tom Brady shenanigans. The King of asterisks will be at it again...